Todd & Blair [2001, Part 1]

[Blair is making out with Cristian]
Cristian: Todd left the bar, Blair. If this is for his benefit, he's not gonna know about it.
Blair: Oh, yeah, he will. Because I'm gonna tell him.


[RJ has brought Todd some wine to ring in the new year, but he has an ulterior motive...]
RJ: You don't mind, uh, Blair banging in the new year with my studly young bartender?
Todd: No, let her dance her cold little heart out.
RJ: No, you miss my point. They are way past dancing. See, well, Vega is my main attraction. The girls are just drawn to him. They flock to him. Hey, can you blame 'em? From what I hear, you know, uh, well -- he's quite...capable.
[Todd looks murderous]
RJ: Well, I don't know about you, but this new year's starting off pretty good! You enjoy the wine!


[Blair and Cristian are still making out]
Blair: Cristian? It doesn't bother you that this is for Todd, does it? I mean, just part of it?
Cristian: It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you.


[After extinguishing the fire he set, Todd looks pointedly at Blair's shoulder, where the strap of her dress has fallen down, and pretends to adjust his own coat shoulder]
Todd: Did you have to take your dress off to beat down the flames?


[Blair accuses Todd of spying on her and Cristian]
Blair: You saw us, and if that fire hadn't of stopped us, no telling what could have happened. You started that fire, didn't you? You freaked.
Todd: Well, I saw you -- yeah, I saw you. You looked ridiculous with that kid, you know that? Like you were playing "Show and Tell" with him. You know, if he asks to bring you to school and show the teacher and the other kids, you really -- you gotta say no.
Blair: You saw us, and that really bugged you.
Todd: Look, what you do on your free time is up to you. You wanna get with Cristian Vega, I don't care.
Blair: Yeah, you care. You care like crazy.
Todd: No, you are confusing me with someone who cares. (heated) You are the one who cares! You didn't come down here to get under Cristian Vega's skin, but under mine. You did all of this for me.


Todd: You wanted me to find you and Cristian together.
Blair: You set the fire!
Todd: Yeah, so what if I did? That would only mean that your plan worked.
Blair: You could have killed me, Todd!
Todd: I am not saying I'm sorry.
Blair: Well, neither am I!


Blair: I walk out on you, you have me arrested! I make a move on Cristian, you practically kill me! I mean, where is it all going to end? Where is it all going to lead, Todd??
Todd: Well, that's easy. You're going to marry me.


Blair: Is that a formal proposal, Todd? Do I get an opportunity to say no?
Todd: Is that your final answer?
[Blair stays silent]
Todd: (threateningly) Fine. We'll see what happens you say no.


Blair: You are unbelievable, do you know that?
Todd: Is that a "yes"?
Blair: Why would I say anything but no?? I'm still married to Max! And why -- why would I marry you?
Todd: Because you should.


Blair: I went through hell for Max. Max wouldn't be Asa's son if it weren't for me. I sacrificed myself for him. And what did I get? Huh? His mistress shoved down my throat. And I forgave Max for Skye!
Todd: That was your first mistake.
Blair: I forgave Max. But when the little virus came out, that Max was a fraud, do you think he could forgive me, huh? He couldn't forgive me! No, no, no -- he had his whole little "family" there. It didn't matter if they were fake! I got tossed out on the street! So, why would I want to marry anyone, huh? I begged him to forgive me --
Todd: (quietly and firmly) You shouldn't beg, Blair. You should never beg.
Blair: Then I asked him for a divorce settlement. And I deserve that, and you know it. And what did he do? He told me to take a flying leap! So you tell me, Todd -- why would I want to marry anyone, huh?
Todd: Because we're the same.
[Blair sighs]
Todd: No, we are. We're the same. We're the same in that we are different. You know, you -- you shot your husband in the back, and -- and I covered the whole thing up and pinned it all on your worst enemy. And you didn't have to ask me to do it. You didn't have to convince me. And I didn't have to tell you what to do, and I didn't have to convince you of anything. We are the same, Blair! Neither one of us forgives or forgets, ever! We are perfect together. We're a match made in -- we're a match made in somewhere.


Blair: You want to marry me? Do you love me?
[Todd stays silent]
Blair: Come on, Todd. Is -- is that what you're trying to say here? I mean, I think it's only fair that I should hear it. So come on -- tell me. Do you love me?


Blair: You can't say it. You can't say you love me, Todd, because you don't.
Todd: I -- I really like that you're Starr's mother.
Blair: (sarcastic) Oh! Oh, Todd! That is just so romantic! I'm totally swept away! Wow! What did I expect? Men are always the same. You say you love someone just to -- to get what you want. First you say it to -- to get me in bed, then you say it to make us have babies, to -- to run your house, to lie, cheat, scam, whatever! And then when you've proved your loyalty, what do they do? They turn against you! They chew you up. and they spit you out! Now you tell me, Todd, why would I love you?
Todd: Whoa --
Blair: Why would I love anybody??
Todd: What -- what if I do say that I -- that I love you?
Blair: You don't love me! You don't love me, Todd! You just want to possess me! You want to own me! You want to say that you have me! You want me for Starr! You want me so you can get back at Max! You want me because you lost Tea!
Todd: (shakily) I -- love you.


Blair: (emotionally) You don't love me. That is such a lie.
[Todd looks at her]
Blair: What?
Todd: I can't believe it. I mean, it's right in front of you -- it's been right in front of your nose for so long, and you still -- you can't see it!
Blair: See what?
Todd: Love isn't real, Blair. It isn't. It's a -- it's a figment of our collective imaginations. It is a colossal, twisted mass hallucination.
Blair: Well, you're wrong Todd. It is real.
Todd: No, no, I'm right. Love is nothing but bad poetry. Love doesn't -- it's not even real. It's an illusion. It's -- it's -- it exists only in our minds. The truth is -- is that we are alone. And the only reason anybody buys into this whole love thing is because they think that it tracks in somehow with what they think they want, which is to not be alone. You name one person who exists completely without love. That's me. Nobody loves me. I don't care. I don't deserve it. Nobody deserves it! It doesn't -- nobody understands that, Blair. It's -- because everybody in this world really is...a moron. Love is a hoax. It's a joke. It's a slight of hand. And the only people -- the only two people in the entire universe who are in on it are you and me. We're the only two people on the planet who get it. I will never hurt you. And I will never let you down, because you expect nothing from me to begin with. There's no downside. If you do get anything from me or I from you, then it's -- certainly more than we ever figured on getting.
[Blair looks at Todd]
Todd: Ah! You see it! Oh yeah, you see it! I can see that you see it!
Blair: (resigned) Yeah. I do.
Todd: (smug) Well then. Perhaps you better reconsider my proposal.


Blair: It would serve you right if I married you.
Todd: Yes, it would.
Blair: It would serve 'em all right.
Todd: Yes, it would.
Blair: Yeah. I'll marry you.
Todd: Yes, you will.


Blair: (to Cristian) You know, I don't think I'll ever really, totally be free of -- of Todd. You know, we have a child together, and, well, our relationship is very complicated. You can't understand Todd and me.


Blair: Cristian, you can't understand Todd and me. I don't even understand us.
Cristian: That's okay. I don't think I really want to.


Blair: Anyone would be lucky to have you.
Cristian: And anyone would be lucky to have you, too, Blair. And trust me -- the perfect man will know that. He won't ask you to be any different.
Blair: (realizing something) You're right, Cristian. He doesn't want me to be different. He accepts me just the way that I am.


[Max says he has a divorce settlement for Blair]
Blair: You know, just give it to me, let me read it, let me sign it, and let's get this over with.
Max: What's your hurry?
Blair: I'm going to marry Todd.


[Max says he doesn't know what Blair will get out of marrying Todd]
Blair: A man who accepts me for who I am -- who doesn't turn on me at the first sight of trouble.
Max: Oh, don't kid yourself. Todd won't wait for the first sign of trouble to turn on you -- he'll do it for pure entertainment value. Count on it.
Blair: It's more than I ever got from you.


Todd: You should keep your hands off of Blair.
Cristian: How do I keep her hands off me, Todd?
Todd: Well, that's easy. Keep your shirt on and keep saying smart stuff.


[Blair tells Max that Todd loves her] Max: Todd doesn't love anyone! He doesn't even love himself. The man is a rapist, a murderer, a psycho! But then, you know that, don't you? You did marry him -- twice! Am I not remembering this? He did hurt you.
Blair: I'm used to that in a marriage.
Max: You think about it. That man, day after day, across the table from you -- next to you on the bed. Is that really the kind of life you want?
Blair: It'll be better than the life I had with you.


Todd: You stay away from Blair, you got that? She is the mother of someone's child. Soon, she will be someone's wife.
Cristian: You talk very big, Manning, but I know Blair wouldn't marry you if her life depended on it.
Todd: You stay away from her. You got that, you little rugrat?


[RJ says that Max may want Blair back]
Todd: Max is out of the equation.
RJ: Oh, no, no, no. You see, for Blair, Max is the equation.
Todd: No, no. No, I took Blair away from Max, just like I took Tea away from you.


Todd: (to Max) Uh, did you pick out a wedding present yet?
Blair: I was just telling Max what I wanted -- a big, fat settlement.
Todd: She registered for it and everything.
Max: I told her I'd fight it. Blair and I will be making each other miserable for years to come.
Todd: Sounds just like being married.


Todd: (to Max) You can keep your money, you can keep your settlement -- Blair doesn't need it.
Blair: Wait, Todd!
Todd: Come on -- let's go. Let's get out of this velvet mausoleum now. I'm gonna show you something that's gonna make you forget this chump -- and his change.


[Todd brings Blair to his jet, but she is still upset he didn't let her get the settlement from Max] Blair: I can't believe that you would kiss off millions -- my millions!
Todd: I will make it up to you!
Blair: How, Todd? By letting me ride in your big ole' jet? (in a mock child's voice) "Gee, Uncky Todd, can I sit by the window??"
Todd: (matching her with his own mock child's voice) "You're not careful, you'll ride on the roof!"


Todd: (to Blair) This is supposed to be one of those -- those -- big romantic gestures that you care so much about! And you're going to enjoy this if it kills you!


[Blair is alarmed that Starr is in a flower-girl dress] Blair: Todd? Why is Starr dressed like this, huh?
Todd: You don't think she looks cute?
Blair: You're the one that's being cute. Too cute.


Blair: (looking at the passport Todd gave her) "Blair Cramer Manning." Is this some kind of joke?
Todd: (shrugging) Yes? Ha ha? I don't know -- can't you just go along with it?


Blair: We're getting married -- when? Today?
Todd: Tonight. Santo Domingo. That's where you divorce Max and you marry me.


[Blair wanted to be the one to tell Starr she and Todd are engaged]
Todd: What difference does it make -- you tell her, I tell her? The -- the -- the point is -- is that we're getting married! We go down there -- it's all arranged! We got a car picking us up at the airport. You go down to the magistrate's office at City Hall. And you sign a couple of papers, and you're divorced from Max! Then we go to a church around the corner, and you marry me! It's really very simple!


Blair: Todd, this is supposed to be our wedding -- our wedding! Our chance to flaunt our happiness all over this stinkin' town! And what's what I wanted. I wanted to see it -- I wanted to see everybody's face. That's what I wanted, Todd. I wanted a big wedding. Now, if we went down to Santo Domingo, it looks like that we're -- that we're ashamed!
Todd: (sighing) I just want the whole stupid thing over with and done.
Blair: (sarcastically) Oh, well, you know, that's all you had to say. That's just so romantic.
Todd: Hey, that's who I am. You know that.


Todd: If you didn't wanna marry me, why did you accept my proposal? Why did you say yes?
Blair: Todd, just listen to me a minute. I do want to marry you. I just don't want to do it like this. I want a big wedding. I want it to be bigger and better than Viki's! I want everybody in Llanview, everybody in this stinkin' town, to be watching us! Looking, staring, just figuring out how we pulled it off. That's what I want!
Todd: You sure -- you sure that's what you want?
Blair: Yes, that's what I want! Why are you trying to change it all now? It's what we both want! Why don't we just stop, slow down, and just -- you know, enjoy all of this?
Todd: I'm just trying to be like everybody else.
Blair: (softly) Todd. We're not like everybody else. That's the whole point. We're different. We're better.


[Todd drops in on Viki and Sam to tell them he is engaged to Blair]
Todd: Okay, good, you're both here. All right, you're going to be the best man. You got three things you got to do -- you got to show up, you got to put a tux on, you got to keep your mouth shut, and don't mess up with the rings, all right? And, Viki, you -- well, you can give Blair away or something.
Sam: Wait a minute -- what are you babbling about?
Todd: Oh, I'm going to have a party that's going to blow this whole town away. That's right. That's right. (to Viki) My wedding is going to way, way, way totally kick your wedding's butt!


Sam: ...the last time you and Blair were going to get married, Blair was the only one who didn't know about it.
Todd: It's a minor detail, which I fixed now. She -- she knows. It's all out in the open. She even answered! Believe me -- very soon, Blair and I are going to be so revoltingly happy, even a sap like you will be sick.


Blair: Todd asked me to make marry him, and I said yes.
Kelly: You're right. You are crazy.


Kelly: (to Blair) Some people bring out the best in one another. Todd brings out the worst in you. Every single time -- every time he gets involved, suddenly it's okay for you to cheat and steal and trample on anybody who gets in your way. I've been there, remember??


Blair: You know, Todd says when I was with Max that -- well, I became someone that he didn't even recognize.
Kelly: Yeah. Somebody halfway decent.


[Todd is excited to share with Viki that he is marrying Blair]
Todd: So, are you going to run a big wedding story in The Banner?? I'm putting a front-page story in The Sun.


Todd: You know, I live in a penthouse! I -- I got -- I own a newspaper! I got a brand new winter coat! And I'm going to get married! And believe me, once I'm married, I'm declaring war on this town! It's take-no-prisoners, scorched-Earth policy!
Sam: Does Blair know this side of you? I wonder if she does.
Todd: (menacing) Don't even think about talking to Blair and trying to get her to not marry me. Nobody, not you or anybody else, is gonna screw this up for me.


Kelly: Todd is a rapist. Is that plain enough for you?
Blair: Kelly, you can't hold that against him for the rest of his life.
Kelly: Yes, I can.
Blair: No, you can't.


Blair: (to Kelly) Well, maybe I'm crazy! My mom, your mom, Cassie -- they're all in looney-bins. Maybe that's why I'm drawn to Todd.


Kelly: (about Todd) He's going to ruin your life. I can't think of anything more frightening!
Blair: I can. I tell you what -- it scares me to think that I could actually be happy with him.


Todd: (to Sam) Okay, you got a kid, but you ain't got no wife. And Viki in there -- her brand-new husband's about to be offed by the mob. Looks like I'm the only one around here who knows how to hold down a relationship.


Kelly: You care about him? About Todd?
Blair: He understands me better than any man has. He gets to me better than any man has. He would do anything for me. Kelly, I -- I had forgotten what that was like.


Blair: (to Kelly) I know Todd goes to the limit, but I know that I push him there! It's -- and I know it's not the things that love sonnets are written about.


Kelly: (about Todd) Do you love him?
Blair: (pausing and then speaking again with emotion) I think I do. (smiling) Imagine that.


[Blair admits she is scared of rushing into marriage with Todd]
Kelly: Tell him what you're feeling.
Blair: Well, he doesn't take disappointment very well, Kelly.


[Blair is surprised when Todd and a group of reporters ambush her at the hotel]
Todd: Ah, there she is, my little honey bunny!
Blair: What is this??
Todd: (quietly, to Blair) Don't screw this up. (louder, to the reporters) Ladies and gentlemen? I, uh, I called you all here to announce our engagement.
Reporter: Blair, tell us how it feels to be on the verge of becoming Mrs. Todd Manning -- again!


[Todd barges into Blair's Palace suite in the middle of the night]
Blair: How did you get in here??
Todd: You really need to talk to somebody about the security around here.


Blair: I'm going to count to ten, and if you're not out of here by five, I'm going to just scream bloody murder.
Todd: Why bother counting to ten if you're going to start screaming after five?


[Blair hallucinates visions of Skye and Kelly]
Kelly: This is all about Todd. She's attracted to him. She can't help herself. He is her deepest and darkest fantasy. She wants Todd more than any other man she's ever known.
Skye: Then why didn't she run off to Santo Domingo and marry him when she had the chance? And why did she throw him out of here tonight?
Kelly: Think. Think about your deepest and darkest fantasy. Would you want that to come true?


[Todd hallucinates visions of Sam and Viki, who claim that Blair is having second thoughts about marrying him] Todd: Blair is not having any thoughts!
Sam: Oh, my word! We're getting testy -- a little defensive here, Todd?
Viki: Yes, yes, yes -- not to mention desperate.
Sam: Mm.
Viki: Chartering airplanes, waking people up in the middle of the night, breaking and entering?
Todd: I'm not desperate. I'm just trying to get what I want.


[Blair is still hallucinating a vision of Skye, berating her over Todd]
Skye: You are so pathetic, you know that? You finally get everything that you need -- a man who's as twisted and psychotic as you are -- not to mention what you deserve. And yet you're too scared to give in. Now, what do you think's going to happen? You won't be able to handle it?


[Skye, Todd, and Max have all barged into Blair's hotel room] Blair: Okay, everybody, out of my room right now!
Todd: (to Skye and Max) Yeah! Come on -- you heard her.
Blair: You, too, Todd.
Todd: I was here first!


[Max wants Skye and Todd to leave Blair’s room so he can speak to Blair in private]
Todd: Don't look at me! I'm not leaving. I paid for this room.
Blair: You did not!
Todd: I didn't?
Blair: No!
Todd: Well, if you let me stay, I will.


Max: But you don't really want to marry Todd.
Blair: I can't wait to marry Todd!
Max: Then why are you waiting?
Blair: You don't know me, Max. You know, that's why we never worked -- because you never really knew me. Well, let me tell you something -- Todd knows me. He knows everything about me. He's the only person who can give me what I want, and I -- I can't wait to be rid of you! And the minute that ink dries on those divorce papers, I'm going to be Mrs. Todd Manning again.
Max: Heaven help you.


[Max has just left after Blair signed the divorce settlement agreement]
Todd: Well, I thought he'd never leave. It's too late to call a wedding planner, you think?
Blair: (sighing) It's not that simple.
Todd: It's not?
[Blair doesn't say anything]
Todd: Oh. Right.
[Todd begins checking his pockets, looking for something until he finds a little ring box in one]
Todd: Hey, incoming.
[Todd tosses a little ring box at Blair, who opens it to find a large engagement ring as Todd watches her]
Todd: Now it is.


Todd: (about the ring) That's the one you wanted, right?
Blair: It is. It's -- it's incredible. It's -- it's beautiful.
Todd: Good. You know, I know Andrew said that St. James was booked this weekend but, you know, maybe I can change his mind -- buy him a new cross or something.
Blair: (whispering) Go away.
Todd: What -- is this not about seeing the bride before the wedding, 'cause I always thought that was way, way stupid.


Rae: What happened?
Todd: Blair doesn't want to marry me. Hey, you -- you got to fix that. You -- you got to make it so that Blair wants to marry me again.


John: Uh, you're still legally married to Max, aren't you?
Blair: Well, you know Todd -- he likes to do things in a very big way.


John: Well, you know -- you and Todd have certainly had a lot of ups and downs together. Why this rush to the altar?
Blair: Why not? We both know what we're in for.


Rae: Why do you think Blair has backed out of wanting to marry you?
Todd: Because she's afraid that things are going to get screwed up -- because they always do. But -- but not anymore, 'cause you're going to fix that, right?


Rae: Blair has just gone through a very difficult marriage. Not to mention that her husband was shot. Maybe she's just not ready to be "got" quite so soon.
Todd: I helped her out of this whole big mess, right? So she should marry me.
Rae: Oh, so you think you deserve it? That -- that she owes you this?
Todd: Yeah.
Rae: So that's what you think marriage is? It's a -- a deal?
Todd: Isn't it?
Rae: I think that people probably want a little more out of it than that.
Todd: You should see the ring I got her. She's getting plenty out of it.
Rae: Emotional presents. Emotional presents? You know? Make her feel like she's loved? Make her feel like you know who she is and how special she is to you?
Todd: So a huge diamond doesn't do that?


[Todd has set up a cake and champagne in Blair's Palace suite] Todd: You like it?
Blair: It's not my birthday.
Todd: I know that. It's just that birthdays, you know, they usually stink, so this one should be special 'cause it's a surprise birthday.


[Blair watches as Todd eats a bite of cake and makes a face]
Todd: It's yellow cake, which is not my favorite, but you like yellow cake. Yellow cake is your favorite, which is why I got it.

Blair: It's not going to work.
Todd: You don't like yellow cake?
Blair: No, I'm talking about you and me. Just -- we just can't go on! It -- we're both going to end up being sorry.
Todd: Why?


[Todd has just given a page from a family Bible that proves that Skye is Rae’s daughter]
Blair: So Skye Chandler is really Rae Cummings's daughter, and she has no idea?
Todd: Not a clue!
[Todd turns back to the cake to cut another slice]
Todd: So you want to celebrate a birthday? Maybe it's Skye's.


[Blair is thrilled that Todd has given her evidence that Skye is Rae’s daughter]
Todd: You really like it.
Blair: Like it? I love it! It's so perfect.
Todd: (bashfully) Yeah, well, I mean, I -- I wanted to get you something unique.
Blair: Probably next to Starr, this is the -- oh, this is definitely the best gift anyone has ever given me, and -- and you gave me Starr, too.
Todd: Well, I know what you like.
Blair: Thank you.
[Todd looks down briefly, then looks back at her and quickly goes in for a passionate kiss]


Todd: (to Starr) You're blackmailing your teacher?
Blair: That's awful!
Todd: That's great!


Starr: (to Blair) Daddy taught me how to find out people's secrets. Remember how I used to spy on you and Uncle Max to help Daddy break you guys up?


Blair: You've turned our daughter into a blackmailer. Are you proud of yourself?
Todd: Well, it depends. (to Mr. Sheridan) What's Starr's report card going to look like?


Blair: Well, you're proud of yourself, aren't you, Todd?
Todd: Oh, yeah! Pretty much.


Blair: (to Todd) I can't believe -- I can't believe I was about to make love to you this afternoon. I can't believe I was going to start up all that mess all over again!


Todd: How you dare lecture me on morals, and -- I -- you're the loon who shot her husband in the back!
Blair: Don't you dare use that against me.
Todd: Hey, if the straight jacket fits.


[Blair and Todd argue about which of them is a worse influence on Starr] Blair: What are you going to do, Todd? Turn her into a repressed sexual sociopath like you?
Todd: Better than being a -- a serial-killer wannabe! How many husbands have you shot, anyway, or tried to kill? You got Asa, you got Max -- I'm sensing a pattern here, Blair!


Blair: You want me to marry you? Then you swear on whatever you hold sacred that you will never use what I did against me. And you swear that you let me raise my daughter the way that I want to without your interference. And you swear --
Todd: I'm not swearing anything.
Blair: What happened to this "I'm fixed! I'm -- I'm in therapy!" Hmm?
Todd: I changed my mind. This is the deal -- you take me, and you take me now, the way I am.
Blair: Here's the deal -- the wedding's off!
Todd: The hell it is.


Todd: You're not gonna call off the wedding, Blair.
Blair: Yeah, well, it's too late -- it's done, Todd. I may be crazy, but I'm not that crazy. You just gave me a reminder of what marrying you would be like again. And I'm not gonna to put myself through that again -- not now, not ever.
Todd: Never say "not ever."


Blair: I see you for what you really are, and I'm telling you now it's over!
Todd: That would be a mistake.
Blair: Almost. But thank God I had my lucky angel watching over me.
Todd: I'm your lucky angel -- I don't know why you haven't figured that out yet.


Skye: You really love Blair, don't you? You'd do anything for her -- stand by her, no matter what. (sighing) That's all I've ever wanted in a man. I sure hope that she knows how lucky she is to have you and that she appreciates you. Well, considering what you've done for her, I hope she's on her knees thanking you every day.
Todd: What is it that you think I did for Blair?
Skye: Oh, you know!
Todd: No, I forget. Remind me.


Skye: So, you bummed now because of Max and Blair?
Todd: There is no Max and Blair -- not anymore.


[John points out that Blair and Todd both looked upset after their fight] Blair: Yeah, well, we get to each other. It's a very passionate relationship -- it always has been.


John: (about Todd) It's got to be tough sharing a child together. Must make it hard to, uh, think about writing him off for good --
Blair: I don't want to write Todd off.


John: (about Todd) When has he ever really given you more than a few fleeting moments of happiness? Hm?
Blair: Well, maybe happiness isn't all it's cracked up to be.


[Blair is rattled after questioning from John] Blair: Is it ever gonna end, Todd? The cops aren't giving up! Skye is not giving up!
Todd: (passionately) Well, I'm not giving up either, unless you've got some crazy idea that you can do this kind of thing by yourself! (trying to be calm again) Now, Blair, you have to decide who has your best interests in mind -- Skye Chandler, or John Sykes, or me.


[Blair slowly turns to look at Todd -- her face is open, vulnerable]
Blair: I want to trust you, Todd. But I'm afraid.
[Todd swallows, hard, as he considers what to say]
Todd: It would be a mistake not to.


Blair: So how did, um, Skye think that she could get you to turn against me? What'd she say?
Todd: She said that you and Max couldn't spend more than a few days apart and that you use people like her and me to liven up your relationship with Max.
Blair: Did you believe her?
Todd: (calmly) Should I?
Blair: No. It's all lies.
Todd: (nodding slightly) Okay.


[Blair says that John told her Todd could never make her happy] Todd: I want something better than happiness. Anybody can think that they're happy. I want us to feel something that nobody else can feel.
Blair: Oh, Todd, how? I mean, what -- what can we feel? How are we supposed to do that?
Todd: We are supposed to feel satisfaction. Triumph.
Blair: How?
Todd: That's easy -- we get married, and then we get even.


Todd: See, Skye and Johnny Law, they tried to turn us against each other. They shouldn't have -- they shouldn't have done that.
[Blair takes a long look at Todd]
Blair: They couldn't have.
Todd: Yeah?
Blair: (nodding)
Todd: Nonetheless, you can't let an attack like that go unanswered.
Blair: (gleefully) It is time we turn the tables.


[Skye insists to John and Rae that Rae shot Max]
John: Did Todd and Blair tell you that?
Skye: What difference does it make who told me? She did it!
John: Don't you get it? They're messing with your head!

[Todd and Blair have just messed with Skye, Rae, and John]
Todd: Look at this -- three people that we hate are -- are fighting like Larry, Curley, and Mo. It -- it's a beautiful thing, Blair. This is what your life could be -- you and I against the world.


[Blair is ecstatic after causing trouble for Skye and Max]
Blair: Ooh! This is so fun!
Todd: (grinning) I'm glad you like it.
Blair: Okay, we've got Max and Skye and everybody else who's hurt me. What about your list?
Todd: Oh, don't worry. Believe me, by the time the evening's through, we'll both get everything we want.


Blair: I can't remember the last time that I had a better time. (laughing) It was great!
Todd: No. No, we were great. Because we were made for each other. You can see that now, can't you?


Todd: You can see that now, can't you? That we belong together?
Blair: Because we cause more damage when we're together?
Todd: Come on -- look what happened tonight. Half the people in this town are ready to kill the other half of the people in this town, and we did that -- in one night! Imagine what we could do in a -- in a lifetime.
Blair: You tell me, Todd.
Todd: Anything.


Todd: Blair, you and I are not like any other two people on the planet.
Blair: 'Cause nobody wants to be like us.
Todd: No, because nobody else in the world understands what we understand. They don't feel good, so they make all these fairy tales up to make themselves feel better. They got -- they got kindness, they got loyalty, they got -- love. But I understand, and I see everything.
Blair: What do you see when you look at me, Todd?
Todd: I see somebody that made a mistake. You know, you tried to live by Max's rules, and it didn't work, because you're not like him. Blair, the best thing that ever happened to you is that Max dumped you. Now you can be who you are. We -- we both can be who we are!
Blair: Yeah, what's that, huh?
Todd: Outcasts. Oddballs. Freaks.
Blair: Oh, yeah, right --
Todd: Pariahs!
Blair: That is such a lovely offer.
Todd: Think about it. You get to be the -- the person, who, publicly, everybody insults, but secretly they all wish that they had the guts that you have.
Blair: I don't know, Todd. You know, it -- it used to be exciting to break all the rules. It wears me out!
Todd: Fine, you want rules? You can have rules! Our own rules for our own world! Look, good is bad, bad is good, cruel is kind, and hate...is love.


Todd: The thing about an atom bomb is that it's great, right, but you gotta choose the perfect moment. You gotta choose the moment that -- that does the most damage, hurts the most people.
Blair: Is that what you wanna do, Todd? Hurt people?
Todd: Yeah. Most of all, I don't want anybody to hurt me.


Blair: You could go to the cops any minute and tell them that I shot Max in the back.
Todd: Why would I do that?
Blair: Well, you said that you didn't want to be hurt.
Todd: Are you planning on hurting me?
Blair: No! I mean, unless you turn on me and, believe me, I can do to you what I did to Max. Only this time the bullet will go right between your eyes.
Todd: Uh-huh. Okay. Fine, you got yourself a deal. I turn you in, you get to shoot me. What about my deal now, huh? You marry me. Let the rest of the world live unhappily ever after. What's it gonna be, Blair?


Todd: Look, I can make Llanview hell on earth all by myself, but -- I could use some company. Come on, Blair, yes or no. Let me know.


[Max threatens Todd and Blair] Max: What the hell kind of game are you two playing? You wanna expose me?
Blair: What if we are, Max? What are you gonna do about it?
Max: You try and take away this life I have built for myself, I'll make sure yours isn't worth living.


[Todd addresses Blair when they are alone in her suite] Todd: Look, enough of the sales pitch, I'm -- I'm offering you me. And you know what that is. So take it or leave it, Blair, now.


Blair: I want it. You -- and everything that goes with it. I want it all, Todd.
Todd: It's right here. It always has been. And all you have to do is take it.


[Todd wakes up after their night of making love to find Blair staring at her engagement ring]
Todd: You like the ring?
Blair: I love the ring. I loved everything about last night. This morning, I woke up clearer and happier than I've been in what seems like forever. You gave me that, Todd.
Todd: So you'll marry me.
Blair: As soon as my divorce is final.
[Blair watches as Todd makes a quick phone call blackmailing a judge into rushing her divorce. After he hangs up, he looks at her]
Todd: Well, there you go. Now there's nothing in your way.


Starr: Are we really gonna be a family this time?
Todd: We already are a family, Starr.
Starr: Like normal people?
Todd: Your mother's not normal.
Starr: She's not?
Todd: No. She's better than that. She sees things that nobody else sees, and she knows what she wants, and she makes sure that she gets it.
Starr: Like you.
Todd: Yeah, like you. Don't forget that. We'll have it all, Starr. Don't worry.


[Kelly is alarmed to hear that Blair accepted Todd's proposal]
Kelly: You promised me you'd say no to him!
Blair: I didn't promise you anything! And if I did, I was wrong.


Kelly: What was it like the first time you married Todd?
Blair: Hm, I did that for his money.
Kelly: The second time?
Blair: That was for love!


Kelly: Blair, do you think that Todd will provide stability for you?
Blair: Yes, I do. Todd knows me better than anybody. Max made me crazy. Todd keeps me sane.


Blair: (to Kelly) I know that Todd loves me, and I can trust him. And I know I can.


[Kelly refuses to be Blair’s maid of honor]
Blair: You know, I don't need you, Kelly. I don't need you! All I need is Todd! And we will be happy! You'll see!


[Blair overhears Starr asking Todd for a baby brother]
Starr: Now, if you and Mommy love each other so much, then you could have another baby! Then we could be a real family.
Blair: Starr! I think that we already are a real family!
Starr: But I want us to have a baby.
[Blair looks at Todd, who avoids looking back at her]
Blair: Well, you know, sweetheart, we could, but then you know what? Daddy and I -- we wouldn't be able to give you all that attention that you love so much. And you know all those toys that you have? Then you'd have to share them, and we want you to stay our princess.
Starr: I'm not giving up.


[Blair worries after Todd tells her Starr eavesdropped on them as they talked about Max’s shooting]
Todd: Starr's fine! Listen to me. Everything's going to be okay -- trust me. Everything is gonna be fine.