Blair and Max have just reunited at the Buchanan Mansion after Max's return from Ireland. They're hugging and kissing in the living room when Todd comes in -- and he's holding Blair's CD in his hands (the one Blair loaded the anti-Max virus on).

Max: What do you want?
Todd: Your wife.

Todd waits a beat as Max looks at Blair.

Todd: Blair, you forgot to tell me something.

--end scene--

Asa walks into the room.

Asa: How many damn times do I have to throw you out of here, Manning?
Todd: I know, I'm like a pesky mosquito, right? Immune to all repellent.

Todd holds up the CD and gives Blair a hot look.

Todd: You never know what kind of a virus I might be carrying.
Asa: Something real sickening would be my guess.
Todd: (tearing his eyes away from Blair) Yeah, for somebody, probably.

Todd opens the CD case and heads over to the desk, where the laptop he bought Starr is set up. Blair rushes after him.

Blair: Todd, could I have a word with you alone, please? Please?
Max: (suspicious) What for?
Todd: Oh, nothing important, Max. Isn't that right, Blair? I mean, I'm just here to visit Starr.
Max: You want to see your kid, you make a schedule and you stick to it. (to Blair) Now, what exactly did you forget to tell him.
Blair: (grabbing to get the CD away from Todd) Exactly what you were talking about, Max. A schedule. And right now, Todd, is certainly not the right time, okay?
Todd: But I'm here now. And I brought my disc. (he waves it around)
Blair: (grabbing for it again) And I'll take that, okay?
Todd: (keeping the CD away from her) No, it's a hell of a program. (looking over at Asa) Maybe everybody will want to take a look.

--end scene--
Max: I don't have time for computer games.
Asa: Just show it to your kid, Manning.
Todd: No, this one's good for all ages.
Blair: Look, nobody's interested here, Todd, okay?

Suddenly, Starr enters the room.

Starr: Daddy, did you bring me a computer game?
Todd: Oh, you bet!

Todd helps Starr get set up at the computer, much to Blair's consternation.

Blair: Starr, look, why don't you take this computer and go upstairs and play in your room with it, okay?
Todd: I don't see what you're so worried about. It's just a computer game.

Todd slips the CD into the computer. Meanwhile, all Blair's behavior's succeeded in doing is making Asa suspicious.

Asa: Now I'm curious.

Asa goes over to look at the laptop while Max pulls Blair over to the couch so they can talk privately.

Max: What's up?
Blair: Nothing. It's Todd, he's just grandstanding, and I hate it!
Todd: (calling over from the desk) It's loading!
Max: (quietly, to Blair) Is there something on that disc about us?

Blair looks worried, but can't bring herself to tell him the truth. Back at the desk, Todd's finished loading the game.

Todd: Now, come on, everybody. Gather around.

Max and Blair reluctantly go back over to the desk. A shot of the computer screen shows that it's not the virus after all -- just a computer game in which little Bo, Asa and Clint heads get squashed by a giant foot.

Asa: What the hell is this?
Starr: It's a game!
Todd: (excitedly) It's not just a game, it's a cowboy game! The way you win is you crush the cowboys with the big foot!

Blair looks mighty relieved.

Starr: Uh-oh, this one's sneaking in, but I hear his boots. (she clicks on the foot) Yes! Got him!
Todd: See, I call it "The Buchanan Bash-A-Roo." (to Starr) Get that yahoo!

Asa's had enough. He slams his hand down on the power button.

Asa: Game over.

Starr gets up from the chair and runs to hug Blair.

Todd: Look, the kid's just playing a game.
Asa: Take your machine and go. (to Blair) You, get rid of him for good, you hear? Max, change the code on the security.

Asa leaves the room in a huff.

Max: (to Todd) Because you're Starr's daddy, you're catching a break. But don't push it.

Starr quickly starts playing the computer game again, as Blair tries to get rid of Max.

Blair: Max, please, I'll handle Todd, all right? Would you -- would you go?
Todd: You heard her, Max.
Blair: Shut up! (to Max) Please, sweetheart?
Max: Just get him out of here.
Blair: I will, I promise.

Max leaves the room and Blair turns on Todd.

Blair: What are you trying to do? Are you just trying to torture me? Is that what you're trying to do?
Todd: Ah, come on, it's just a joke.
Starr: (playing the game) Squish! I got another one!
Blair: (holding her head in her hands) Okay, Todd, did you "squash" it, or not? Huh?
Todd: Well, I took care of the virus if that's what you're talking about.
Blair: (relieved) Well, Starr, you got a good daddy.
Starr: What did he do?

Blair closes the door to the living room so they can't be heard by anyone outside.

Blair: He took care of Mommy's big monster. And it looks like it won't hurt us anymore.

--end scene--

When the scene returns, Todd and Blair are standing by the fireplace, watching Starr play Buchanan Bash-A-Roo.

Todd: Smart kid.
Blair: She's a very smart kid, but she needs structure, Todd. Look, we need to set up a schedule, here, so she'll know when to expect you.
Todd: A -- a schedule?
Blair: Yes, a schedule. Maybe Friday afternoons -- she gets out of school early -- and I was thinking maybe every other weekend.
Todd: I got a schedule for you. How about I see her whenever the hell I want to?
Blair: Todd, come on. I mean, divorced couples set up schedules for their children here. Why don't you just act like a normal person for once? Maybe for the sake of your daughter?
Todd: Well, for Starr's sake, or for your sake?
Blair: She needs to know when to expect you.
Todd: No, she likes to be surprised.
Blair: Well, just do it for the novelty of it, then.
Todd: (looking at Blair intently) Well, I might do it for you.

Blair seems touched by this. She smiles a little.

Blair: All right. Well, then, do it for me.
Todd: Nah! (he grins and looks over at Starr)
Blair: Todd, I'm so close to having the life that I want. Look at me.
Todd: (reluctantly turns to face her)
Blair: No more lies, no more schemes.
Todd: You're not serious.
Blair: Yes, I am serious. I want a real marriage, a real family.
Todd: Over my dead body.

--end scene--

When the scene returns, Todd is ranting about what Blair's just said to him.

Todd: You want a "family" and -- yeah, have you talked to Starr about this? Because I know, for one thing, she doesn't want some snot-nosed little Holden running around.
Blair: (panicked) Keep your voice down, okay? All right, all right, I will -- I will bring Starr to you, whatever you want, Within reason.
Todd: What does that mean?
Blair: We'll figure something out, okay, Todd? Where are you staying anyway these days?
Todd: Does that matter?

Todd and Blair glare at each other for a moment.

Todd: Look, Starr calls me and says she wants me to come here, I'm coming here.
Blair: (with realization) You're going to ruin this for me, aren't you, Todd?
Todd: Look, you -- you talk about happiness all the time, and this -- you think you can find whatever it is that you think you want in this fantasy-land? Good for you. (looking around the room) Seems a little twisted to me, but to each his own.
Blair: Well, you know what twisted's like, isn't it, Todd?
Todd: You flatter me.

Todd turns and walks away, but Blair calls him back.

Blair: Todd, wait.
Todd: (turns around)
Blair: Thank you.

Todd stares at Blair and says nothing.

--end scene--

Later, at The Sun office, Todd is sitting at his desk, watching the computer as Blair's virus loads.

Todd: You want a real marriage and a real family with a bull-headed, self-righteous snake!

The virus loads and five damning words appear on the screen: "MAX BUCHANAN IS A FRAUD."

Todd: Bull-headed snakes. And self-righteous snakes. And best of all -- fake snakes.

--end transcript--