Todd & Blair [2003, Part 1]

Blair: Ooh, Sam, I am so glad you are here.
Todd: Yeah, personally, I'd rather live for a few more years, but whatever.


Blair: (to Sam) I really wouldn't worry about Todd. It's a Todd thing. It's how he is, you know. He hates it when normal people are happy.


Sam: Todd cares about you. And with the two of you living under the same roof --
Blair: I can handle Todd.
Sam: Except when you can't.


Blair: Todd, you can't make up lies about Mitch Laurence.
Todd: Why not? I make up lies about everybody else.


Blair: You are not Mitch Laurence, Todd. And I know that you think that you are. I know you think that you deserved to die in Ireland. I know that you think that you're always going to be the man that raped Marty Saybrooke, but you're not. You're not, Todd, because you're not that man anymore, and I know that. I know that. Because I see you. I see how you treat your son, I see how you treat your daughter, and I -- I see how you treat me, Todd. You deserve to be forgiven, Todd, and you deserve to be loved. Please believe me.


Blair: You know, you can act all tough and all, but I know how you really feel.
Todd: Oh, really?
Blair: Mm-hmm.
Todd: Can you bend spoons with that mind of yours now?


Todd: You care about me?
Blair: Yes.
Todd: That's funny because all you say is how much you hate me.
Blair: I hate some of the things that you've done, Todd, but I don't hate you.
Todd: Oh, you know what I hate? I hate when you start sounding like Viki.


Blair: You've tried to spend the rest of your life trying to make up for what you did to Marty.
Todd: I've done such a great job with that.
Blair: See? See? You are down on yourself, Todd.
Todd: No, no, I love myself.
Blair: Marty's not worth it, Todd. She's not worth the prison that you've built for yourself.


Todd: Mitch Laurence takes Viki's baby away from her without her even knowing.
Blair: Mm-hmm.
Todd: What did I do? I took Jack away from you and told you that he was dead. Now, you don't see any similarities there between those two things?
Blair: I know that you felt bad about it, and I know that you feel bad about it now, or we wouldn't be having this conversation.
Todd: So I'm just bad because I feel bad but I'm not intrinsically evil?
Blair: Todd, an evil person couldn't love their children the way that you love yours. They couldn't take care of me the way that you've taken care of me and allowed me to see my children.
Todd: Well, maybe I just owed you one.
Blair: No, maybe you just can't admit that you could actually -- actually be nice for a change.
Todd: I'll admit that I'm not evil, but I am certainly not nice.


Blair: You know I loved you, Todd.
Todd: Yeah, till you wised up.
Blair: You know, Todd, if you would stop all this self-loathing stuff, then maybe everyone wouldn't loathe you.
Todd: Everyone like who?


Todd: Careful, Blair. Sam's going to start to think that you care about me.


Blair: (about Shawna) It looked like that -- that woman was -- was -- was all over you.
Todd: You know what? So what if she was?
Blair: So what? So what? So what if Starr saw that, Todd?
Todd: Starr sees you with Sam all the time.
Blair: Oh, come on. That is so different, and you know it.
Todd: It's only different because one's you and the other's me.


Todd: You just want me to be jealous.
Blair: Well, you are.
Todd: You sure about that? Hmm. I know you, Blair. And I know what you want. You want me to say that I want you.


Todd: You're jealous of me and -- my new intern.
Blair: Who? Shawna Quinlan? She's a tramp, Todd. Why would I be jealous of her?
Todd: Because you never got over me. Come on, I'm right about this, right? I am. You're the one. You still want me.
Blair: You think I still want you? Are you nuts?
Todd: Okay, that's, like, two completely separate questions.


Blair: (mocking Shawna) "I love men, especially men with power." Come on. I mean, you'd actually give that girl the time of day?
Todd: You know, Blair, I've heard it called a lot of things, but I've never heard it called "the time of day" before.
Blair: Okay, Todd, then what would you call it, then, hmm?
Todd: I don't know. What do you and Sam call it?


Blair: Sam and I are going to go away.
Todd: Oh, no, don't tell me. Sam made you another fantasy video. It's him dressed up on a beach somewhere, isn't it?


Blair: I'm going away with Sam and you can't stop me.
Todd: No, you're not going anywhere.
Blair: Why? Because you're jealous?
Todd: No, because I don't want you to be dead. You're going to leave me here to explain that to my little girl? "Oh, oh, jeez, Starr, you know, your mama died because she couldn't wait to play naked beach blanket bingo with Sam."


Todd: The moment I'm on a deserted island, you go after Sam. I mean, Sam. Blair, of all people, what's he got, like a million, maybe a million and a half? I mean, I would think that you would at least hold out for Asa and let him take you for one more spin.
Blair: Oh, oh, oh, how dare you! I'm through dating men for their money. And you know what? If Asa didn't have a dime left in his pocket, I would pick him over you any day!
Todd: Well, that's good, because you're never going to get me.
Blair: I -- I don't want you, Todd! I don't even know why you would even say that. And you know what? Why don't you get it through your stinking head that I hate you!
Todd: Yeah? Well, not as much as I hate you.
[They kiss]


[After the kiss…]
Todd: What was that for?
Blair: What do you think? You kissed me.
Todd: You kissed me.
Blair: No, you kissed me. And frankly, it made me sick.
Todd: Okay. That's it. You really are as crazy as everybody else in your family.
Blair: Oh, why? Because I let you kiss me?
Todd: You know what? I think that maybe you do belong in an insane asylum in Switzerland. Maybe the doctors can knock some sense into you, and maybe then you will realize that it was you who kissed me.
Blair: Oh, I most certainly did not.
Todd: Well, what do you call what you just did to me?
Blair: You kissed me, Todd. You kissed me. You held me --
Todd: No, I didn't. You smacked me on the lips right here --
Blair: And then you just kissed me really, really hard!
Todd: Fine. It was mutual. How about that? I'll give you that much.
Blair: No. No, no, no. It was not mutual. You kissed me.
Todd: Come on. You really think I would kiss you without you wanting me to?
Blair: No.


Todd: (to Blair about Sam) First you kiss another guy behind his back, and now you're going to lie? This doesn't say much for the future you and Sam have together.


Todd: I'm just trying to get you to realize that you and Sam -- you're not right for each other.
Blair: Well, we are right for each other.
Todd: No. Sam -- to him, lying is poison. And to you, it's like breathing.
Blair: Oh, right. And look who's talking.
Todd: Me? No, no. I love to lie. That's why we're right for each other.


Blair: I wish I had met Sam a long time ago, and I wish that I had never met you.
Todd: I don't believe you.


Blair: I told you I hated you! I hate you, Todd!
Todd: Be careful. Remember what happened the last time you said all this.


Todd: (to Blair) Here's your choice, okay? You can take what's behind curtain a, which is Sam's half-baked plan guaranteed to leave your adorable children motherless, or you can take the box, which is you can stay here.


Sam: What makes it okay for you to take Blair out of here, Todd, and not me?
Todd: Well, to begin with, I wasn't smuggling Blair out for a roll in the hay. I was taking her to go visit her sick mother. And the other thing is that I'm an expert at pulling fast ones and you're not.


Blair: I wanted to be with you. I did. But I can't. No matter how much -- how many times I tell myself it's because of those mobsters, it's --
Sam: It's not because of the mobsters. It's because of Todd.
Blair: You were right. I can't be with you because of Todd. And I want to blame the people that are following me, but I can't -- not if I'm going to be honest.


Viki: I don't know why you can't just admit that you want Blair back. Why can't you just admit that you love her?
Todd: I do.
Viki: Well, my goodness. Now, I'll bet that didn't hurt a bit, did it?
Todd: It kind of did. It kind of hurt my voice a little.
Viki: It's really nice. You want her back. You love her.
Todd: All right, Viki, you don't got to keep saying it.


Viki: I don't know if you've considered this, but Blair might actually be seeing Sam because she has feelings for him.
Todd: No, she doesn't.
Viki: Well, she might.
Todd: Then why would she kiss me?
Viki: Did she?
Todd: Yes, she did.
Viki: Oh.
Todd: I mean, she slapped me right after, but she did kiss me.


Sam: He hurt you, Blair. He hurt you in the deepest way imaginable, and you still feel something for him.
Blair: It was just a little kiss.
Sam: Yeah -- it's not -- not with you and Todd. No, it could never be just a kiss. It's -- I mean, Todd is a fact of your life, like -- like your birthday -- like your birthday and like the color of your eyes. You can't change that.


Blair: I came home because I didn't want to be in the cabin with Sam. I wanted to come home. I wanted -- I wanted to be with you.
Todd: What happened to what you said before? What happened to you hated me? Isn't that what you said? What happened to that?
Blair: Well, that's what I -- I told myself that's what I wanted to believe because caring about you can be very painful.
Todd: You care about me?
Blair: I always have, Todd. You know, every time that we get close, you always -- or I find out that you do something that hurts me so much that I can't trust you anymore. But then you do something -- somehow, some way, you get me to trust you and you get me to -- to want you again.


Blair: Have you changed?
Todd: I hate change.
Blair: Yeah, I know. That's never been easy for either one of us.
Todd: Well, that's why we never bother with it.


Todd: You just finished telling me that you can't forgive me for what happened with Jack, so --
Blair: Well, I thought about what you did to Jack and to me and to us. And I thought about how you told me that he had died and how you took him away from me.
Todd: Look, Blair --
Blair: And I've also heard that you -- I've heard you say you're sorry to Jack and to me. And I've seen you with Jack and Starr, and I know how much you love them, Todd.
Todd: I -- I do.
Blair: I know that you do. And I also know how hard it has been for you to have to live with yourself for what you did. Look, I know you, Todd. I know you better than anyone. I married you three times. You're my husband. And I -- I know that you love me, even though you can't say it.
Todd: I love you.
Blair: I love you, Todd. And I forgive you.


Todd: What are you doing?
Blair: Just watching you sleep.
Todd: I don't sleep much anymore.
Blair: Oh, yes, you do. You sleep with a big smile on your face.
Todd: Yeah?
Blair: Mm-hmm.
Todd: Must have been that dream I was having, you know, where you forgave me and gave me -- gave us another chance.
Blair: That wasn't a dream. That was real.


Todd: So, here we are.
Blair: Here we are.
Todd: Took a while.
Blair: As usual. But you know what? We always seem to end up here, don't we?
Todd: It's weird, huh?
Blair: Not to me.
Todd: Are you sure this is where you want to be?
Blair: I've wanted to be here for a long time.
Todd: Would've been nice of you to clue me in on that, you know.


Blair: I think it was when -- maybe the first night that I slept here. I think that's when I started to want you. I just didn't know it.
Todd: But you know it now.
Blair: Especially now. After last night -- you were so loving and tender.
Todd: All right, that -- that doesn't leave this room. You know that?
Blair: Oh, okay. Okay. On one condition.
Todd: What, you negotiating already?
Blair: Mm-hmm. I think I heard Hedy leave with Jack, and Starr’s at school. So why don't you show me how loving and tender you can be all over again?


Blair: You always do that Todd stuff when you don't get what you want.
Todd: Oh, now you think I got what I want?
Blair: Well, if it's me you want.


Todd: What about Sam?
Blair: I care about Sam. But it's over, Todd. All you got is me.


Todd: Can I help it if Shawna’s got a little thing for me?
Blair: Oh. Because you are so irresistible?
Todd: Isn't that what you think?
Blair: Well, I think it's okay for me to feel that way.


Todd: What am I supposed to do about it?
Blair: Not be so bad.
Todd: But that's what people like about me.


Todd: Look, Blair, I'm not Sam, all right? I'm not going to change that much.
Blair: Oh -- I don't want you to. I just want you to be the Todd that I know.
Todd: Oh, and love?
Blair: You have to ask?


Blair: (about Shawna) If you don't do something, then I might just have to take matters into my own hands.
[Todd turns and leaves]
Blair: Hey, hey! Where you going?
Todd: I am going to fire Shawna. The last time you took matters in your own hands, someone went out of a window.


Blair: I owe you my life.
Todd: Well, you know, don't make it out like I'm some kind of a hero.
Blair: Oh, you are. You are to me.
Todd: This is my reputation we're talking about.


Blair: So why don't you join me in the celebration and do a little jogging with me --
Todd: No, no, no. When I got thrown off the football team, I made a vow that I would never again do a wind sprint.


Blair: Come on, it's time to celebrate. I'm free, and you are my hero.
Todd: Look, I'm nobody's hero.


Blair: You put up with my bad attitude, my bad moods, my complaining --
Todd: And you did. You complained about everything.


Blair: (to Todd) You know, no wonder I fell in love with you all over again. You always act like everything is, like, no big deal. But you have a heart bigger than anybody, Todd.


Blair: (about the mob hit)So, what am I supposed to do, just forget it all happened?
Todd: Yeah. And you're supposed to think about what Jack's face looks like the first time he sees you in the morning or how much you want to see Starr's Christmas pageant next year.
Blair: We got our family back.
Todd: Yeah, we do.


Henchman: Where is Blair?
Todd: You shut up about Blair.
Henchman: You know, Blair is so beautiful. I almost hated to scare her like that.
Todd: Did I stutter when I said "Shut up about Blair"?


Todd: I've got Andrew here so that he can marry us right now.
Blair: You could have asked me first.
Todd: Well, consider yourself asked.


Andrew: Blair, I'm sorry. I would've never come over here if I had known this was --
Todd: Hey, whose side are you on?
Andrew: You haven't even proposed to her. You don't have a marriage license. You don't have a witness. As usual, you haven't given any thought to this at all.
Todd: So the place isn't crawling with flowers and bows, and that means that I don't care?


Todd: I just want to get married. I'm sick of us not being married.
Blair: I am, too.


Todd: You love me.
Blair: And?
Todd: We should get married because that's how people who feel about each other -- that's what they do -- they get married. We should get -- let's get married.


Blair: What is the rush? I mean, come on, we just -- you know, we got -- we just got back together.
Todd: Right, right, because we belong together. And, okay, sure, Blair, look, we fight, we break up, but we always wind up back here. So we should get married. We should be together because that's the way we're supposed to be.
Blair: It's what I want. It's what I've wanted for a long time.


Blair: You have no reason to be jealous of Sam, okay? Please. I chose you, Todd, and I love you.
Todd: Do you mean that?
Blair: You and Jack and Starr are all I ever need.


Todd: I'll make you happy.
Blair: What about you, Todd?
Todd: What?
Blair: Will it make you happy?
Todd: Yes.
Blair: Andrew, we're ready!


Blair: Andrew, can we say our own vows?
Andrew: If you'd like.
Blair: Todd, promise me that you'll never lie to me again.
Todd: Okay.
Blair: And no matter what happens that you'll never put me through the pain that you put me through the last time we got married when I found out about Jack.
Todd: I won't. I promise. And I'll hurt anybody else who does.
Andrew: Todd --
Todd: This is about protection, right? To honor and love and protect. Well, I'll protect you, Blair, even if it's from myself.
Blair: And I believe you. And if we ever find ourselves in a bitter, horrible battle --
Todd: We won't.
Blair: But if we do, promise me that you won't use Starr and Jack against me, no matter what happens.
Todd: You going to swear to the same thing?
Blair: Yes.
Todd: Well, then, I will, too. I swear.
Andrew: Todd?
Todd: Right. I -- when I was -- don't laugh -- I was on a raft stuck in the middle of the ocean and I couldn't see anything but water around me, and I -- every time I decided that there was no hope and I thought I wanted to die, I wouldn't let myself because I started to think maybe, just maybe, if I held on for another minute, I might be able to get back to this -- to you and to Starr and Jack. I couldn't die without trying to get back to my family. It's the only thing that kept me alive.
Blair: I'm so glad it did.


Andrew: Do we have the rings?
Blair: I --
[Todd takes out the rings]
Todd: She said I wasn't prepared.
Blair: You -- you are prepared! Todd.
Todd: Yeah, I told you. (to Andrew) And, look, you know, while we're promising stuff, I should let you know that I promise I will never call you to do this ceremony ever again.
Blair: And I think he's right about that. I think this one's for keeps.